In order to love yourself the way you are you need to know who you are. And the reality is that most people out there don't know who they really are. They only know what they have been molded into under the pressure of family and social expectations. They lack self-awareness. They can vaguely feel the simmering discontent somewhere deep inside them - what you refer to as the "low level anxiety" in your stories - but most just end up rationalizing it away. I know I did for a while. Until I realized that I didn't want to accept myself as I was if it meant I had to live a life where I am unhappy.